LET'S JUST FIX IT
“We need to improve our communication...” - people say this in relationships, at work, in partnerships.
It sounds simple — but it rarely is. Because the truth is, it’s not easy to know where communication has actually broken.
Very often, we try to move from point A (the problem) straight to point Z (the solution). Without passing through the messy, uncomfortable, emotional middle. But that “middle” — that’s where everything real happens.
It’s where we ask:
— What are you feeling?
— What does this mean to you?
— What do you actually need?
— What are you afraid of?
This part is often skipped — not because we don’t care, but because it’s filled with tension.
It asks us to stay present when it’s easier to withdraw.
It invites honesty when we’re not sure it’s safe.
It means listening without rushing to defend or explain.
That’s hard. For couples. For any partnership where connection matters.
So what happens? Solutions come too soon. One pushes, the other gives in.
No one feels truly seen or heard.
And the same patterns repeat.
The problem looks solved.
But is it really?
Real change begins in that uncomfortable space in between.
That’s where trust can grow — and where conversations stop being about winning, and start being about understanding.
In couple coaching, we help people discover this middle part — the part where true connection starts.
It sounds simple — but it rarely is. Because the truth is, it’s not easy to know where communication has actually broken.
Very often, we try to move from point A (the problem) straight to point Z (the solution). Without passing through the messy, uncomfortable, emotional middle. But that “middle” — that’s where everything real happens.
It’s where we ask:
— What are you feeling?
— What does this mean to you?
— What do you actually need?
— What are you afraid of?
This part is often skipped — not because we don’t care, but because it’s filled with tension.
It asks us to stay present when it’s easier to withdraw.
It invites honesty when we’re not sure it’s safe.
It means listening without rushing to defend or explain.
That’s hard. For couples. For any partnership where connection matters.
So what happens? Solutions come too soon. One pushes, the other gives in.
No one feels truly seen or heard.
And the same patterns repeat.
The problem looks solved.
But is it really?
Real change begins in that uncomfortable space in between.
That’s where trust can grow — and where conversations stop being about winning, and start being about understanding.
In couple coaching, we help people discover this middle part — the part where true connection starts.